Heart of Christmas
by CayStar
Summary: Carlisle and Edward finally get exactly what they want for Christmas. AU- vampslash, One shot for now.


_**AN: This is a little something I came up with for Christmas. I love Carlisle and Edward vampslash stories and I decided to put my own twist on one. This will eventually be continued once I finish all the chapters. It will be a short story- probably less than ten chapters if even that many- but I hope you enjoy it. I'm fairly sure that every chapter will be told from Edward's POV but I'll let you know if it changes.**_

_**This isn't smut as much as emotional exploration. That said, there is definitely slash involved. We'll just see where it goes.**_

* * *

_December 1918_

I was curled up in his chair watching the snowflakes drift lazily down- heavy and wet, and unstoppable in their relentless descent. Normally I loved the snow- I was still a boy in many aspects after all- but this year was different. The snow reminded me of how I felt too often- cold, isolated, and still as pure in body as the day I was born.

My mind was a whole different story.

He tried to dissuade me at every turn, but nothing kept my fantasies at bay, and I was reaching the point that I was nearly compelled to act on them. All it would take would be one hint of indication that his resolve was weakening and I would pounce- like the cat he liked to compare me to when we hunted.

I perked up a bit when I heard his thoughts at the very edge of my gift. My range was expanding every day, and I was so tuned in to his presence that he sometimes failed to mask his thoughts before I was able to pick them up.

He was far enough away that I only caught a stray word or two, but the tenor of his mind was filled with an aching desire that stopped my unnecessary breath at once. I panicked at first, wondering if he had met someone in town that would draw him away from me, but my mind was set at ease by a single whisper of longing... _Edward_

Without stopping to think I was up and out the door within a second, sprinting unerringly for his location as he drew me in like a beacon. Since I woke to this life I was tossed at sea, lost in the swirling upheaval of my thirst, emotions, loss, and grief. He was my lighthouse, holding strong against the waves, leading me home every time.

The snow masked his scent but I would always be able to find him anywhere. Even if I couldn't hear his thoughts- thoughts that were currently reciting the latest medical journal- I _felt_ him, deep inside. We were joined, as more than a childe and a sire, and I would do anything to make him see that.

He let out a startled growl when I approached, but quickly brought it under control when he recognized me. _Edward?_

I hit my knees and pressed my face to his taut stomach, desperate for his touch after just a few short hours apart. His hands moved without thought to comb through my wayward hair, filling me with peace at the affectionate gesture. I felt a soft growl begin in my chest and his hand stopped at once, his mind filled with shock.

Looking up into his golden eyes, I saw my own dark orange irises reflected back in his thoughts. He was beyond words at the moment- mind whirling in opposing waves of joy, disbelief, denial, and _love_.

I watched him unapologetically, drinking in his appearance like the thirsty newborn that I was, lingering on the features that had become so familiar to me over the past few months. He was my whole world after I lost my parents, and nearly my own life, and he didn't have a clue just how much I truly worshipped him.

"Edward, you're... purring? How? I don't understand-" _he shouldn't be doing that. It's not possible. Aro said only ma- _His thoughts broke off into a frustrating translation of Homer's _The Odyssey_ from Latin into German, both languages I was gradually learning from his attempts at hiding his mind from my gift.

Ignoring the rhythmic chanting of his thoughts, I focused on his handsome face. Those golden eyes I coveted were dark and hooded, narrowed in an expression I didn't recognize but that instinctively drew me in. His soft blonde hair was wet with snow, and disheveled with the force of his run. I realized he was carrying several small paper-wrapped bundles, and my curiosity was piqued for a moment as I looked them over, but my attention invariably returned to his beautiful face.

I leaned forward to hug him once more, and the packages in his arms tumbled to the ground. Two strong arms lifted me up and drew me into his embrace as I felt his cool breath across my neck, "Oh, Edward." _Such a treasure, he's so perfect, so beautiful, he deserves so much more than I-_

"I missed you, Carlisle. You were gone too long," I cut off his self-deprecating thoughts with a happy smile and another hug, nearly quivering like a happy puppy at the feel of his arms around me.

His arms tightened for a minute, then he pulled back with a wistful smile. "You're covered in snow, Edward. Let's go back to the house and dry off, shall we?"

Happy to agree, I turned and sprinted toward the house, eager to be home with my Carlisle. His thoughts drifted after me, and I heard his sigh as he gathered up the forgotten packages and followed me quickly, _my beautiful boy._

I tried not to break stride, not wanting to give him any indication I heard him, but thoughts like that were what I lived on. Thoughts like that let me know that he felt what I felt- the connection, the pull, the _ownership_ that I would gladly give him. He owned me before he even bit me- I was his the first time my green human eyes met his unearthly golden ones across the room.

I was just sixteen years old when I first met Carlisle Cullen. He was invited to our family home for my parents' Christmas party. My mother introduced him as the new doctor in town, and I can still remember how my jaw dropped when I took in his manly perfection.

My longing for men was my deepest secret, one I knew my parents would never understand or accept. As long as I could remember, I was drawn to the male form- never once attracted to the so-called fairer sex.

Dr. Cullen watched me that night, though he was better at hiding his interest than I was. When my mother asked me to play for their guests, I settled at my piano bench and began the most complex piece I had mastered thus far.

The song kept my attention focused on my hands as the crowd around me quickly fell silent. It wasn't precisely Christmas music, but the notes gave voice to the feelings I had when I looked into his eyes. Hope, joy, sheer anticipation- he embodied them all.

I raised my head as I finished and gave the adults around me a modest smile before my eyes sought his for approval. He was standing completely still- I now realized he must have forgotten to move while his attention was focused on my playing. His eyes were filled with tears and he gave me a soft smile when I met his longing gaze.

We saw each other in passing over the next several months, but we never spoke until I saw his worried face hovering over my hospital bed. He'd been horrified to see me there, weak with the influenza ravaging my slender body.

I thought at first that I had already died, and I was glad that his face was the one to greet me in heaven, but as a cough choked me and his cool hands raised me up to sit I realized I was still alive- for the time being.

He remained by my bedside as I slipped in and out of delirium, doing his best to make me and my mother as comfortable as we could be. I was unconscious when my mother begged him for my life, but he showed me the memory not long after I awoke- tinged as it was by his longing for me.

I heard his thoughts before I woke from the change- hazy and indistinct- but he was much more open before he learned of my gift. If I hadn't been distracted by my thirst and completely in shock from the changes to my body, I probably would have forced his hand then.

By the time I was ready to push him further, he had his defenses firmly in place, acting strictly as a mentor to my wayward lust-driven self. Every attempt to get closer was immediately rebuffed, and followed by his loud mental self-loathing.

Carlisle approached the house warily, as if he could suddenly read my mind. I was ready for him, standing in front of the fireplace with my wet shirt and socks discarded on the floor. I wasn't above playing dirty, and despite his impeccable control I knew his instincts were every bit as strong as mine.

I kept my eyes on the fire as he came through the door, but I still heard and saw the exact moment his eyes fell on me. His breath caught heavily and his eyes roamed the bare skin I had exposed. I looked at myself through his eyes, seeing an object of unmentionable beauty instead of the scrawny teen I knew I was.

His defenses were down and I took the chance to turn and meet his dark eyes with my own hungry gaze. _Oh, my boy._

I growled at his unspoken words and took two steps in his direction when he suddenly froze and began backing away, shutters going up in his mind and over his eyes at once. "Edward-" he began warningly, but I had enough and I wasn't going to be thwarted this time.

I stalked him like he was my prey instead of my sire, thoroughly enjoying the frazzled state of his weakening mental defenses. His eyes dilated as my smile widened and I took the opportunity to rush the last few steps to stand directly in front of him.

His eyes traced my face as if he was devouring me with his sight alone. I was laid bare, defenses down, letting him see everything he meant to me. I feared that speaking might break the spell we were under, but I couldn't hold back a plaintive whisper, "_Carlisle._"

_Oh, I can't. I shouldn't. He's so beautiful, so perfect. I want, but I- _Determined to have my way, I pressed my chest against his and looked into his eyes as I leaned the last few inches to press my lips to his.

There was blissful silence in my mind for the space of two human heartbeats, then suddenly the tables were turned. His deep growl of "_Mine"_ was echoed savagely in his suddenly feral thoughts as he pulled me close.

His strong arms wrapped around me, holding me close to his muscled body, and I yielded to him effortlessly. His lips covered mine and I groaned into his mouth as his tongue explored where no one had ever tasted me before. I shivered when I caught his mental picture of him exploring yet another place that had never been touched.

"Yes, Carlisle. Please! I want it. I want you. Please don't stop," I pleaded with him as he moved his lips to my neck, his tongue tracing the bite that stopped my heart. I sensed no hesitation in his mind, but I was terrified he would pull away at any moment.

_Shh, my boy,_ his mental voice was soothing as his touch set me afire. _I may not deserve you, but I cannot resist you any longer._

His words gave me courage, and I ripped his shirt to pieces as I ran my hands over his skin, feeling every bulge of muscle, every raised scar that made my venom boil with possessive retribution. I vowed to ask him about the marks that marred his perfection, few as they may be. For now it simply wasn't important.

I growled when he moved away, but he captured my hand and pulled me purposefully toward his bedroom. _Are you sure, Edward?_

All I could do was nod in agreement as I followed my whole world through the narrow doorway.

His eyes were deadly serious when he turned to face me next to the bed. I saw myself in his mind- eyes bright, chest heaving, hair in complete disarray. For the first time since my death, I truly looked alive.

"Edward, you need to certain you want to do this. Once we start, I'm not convinced I will be able to stop. I-" he broke off and looked down at our clasped hands as he finished the thought in his mind, _I have wanted you too much, for far too long._

Leaning closer, I pressed a gentle kiss to his swollen lips, overcome by the joy I felt at the simple act. I smiled up at him, touched by the dazed look on his face. It was a powerful feeling to know I affected him just as much as he affected me. "I know, Carlisle. I've wanted you for more than a year."

The shock on his face was echoed in his mind, and I let out a quiet laugh at his surprise. "You- you mean- this wasn't just-" _I thought it was the change. I thought you were influenced by your newborn urges and this strange pull between us. I-_

"Carlisle, stop!" I laughed again. "I have always been attracted to men- you haven't corrupted me as you think. My human memories are fading, but I still remember clearly the first time I saw you, and the look on your face as you watched me play."

My breath caught as the memory flooded his mind, and I saw the slightly younger, much healthier version of myself in his eyes. This time, he let me feel what he thought- the longing, the desire that made him feel like a predator for the first time since his change so long ago.

I marveled at the restraint he used- the effort was so much greater than even what he required working around fresh blood at the hospital. He wanted me- _needed_ me- every bit much as I needed him.

Using my speed, I turned and pushed him back on the bed, straddling him as I pushed my eager cock against his. He threw his head back and groaned, then flipped me suddenly in a necessary show of dominance.

Gone was every trace of my gentle, civilized sire. His black eyes flashed with lust and his growl was fierce as he shredded the remainder of our clothes and covered my thinner body with his own.

I was lost in a tidal wave of sensations, every movement echoed back from his mind, and every emotion doubled in my overloaded body. His hands were gentle and sure as he worshipped my body and prepared me for him.

The moment we were joined, I nearly blacked out from the overwhelming force of pleasure. I could feel him pressed deep inside me, and at the same time I could feel how my body felt wrapped tightly around his beautiful cock.

"Stop, please, just for a minute," I gasped out between heaving breaths. He looked down at me in worry, but understood the look on my face.

_I love you, Edward. You have brought life to my previously meaningless existence. I live for you, my sweet boy. _His arms wrapped underneath me, drawing our bodies even closer together as we adjusted to this momentous change in our relationship.

We kissed languidly as my mind slowed its spinning, and I was finally able to nod for him to move. His eyes stayed locked on mine with every slow stroke, in and out, in and out, in and out.

Each movement pulled us closer together until we were no longer two beings, but one. I wept when his hand lovingly brought me to release, his own following close behind me.

He collapsed on top of me, resting there for a minute before he rolled to his back and pulled me down to rest on his chest. His thoughts were tranquil- _blissful_- and mine were equally content.

When I finally regained the use of my shaky muscles, I leaned up to rest my chin on my hand and look into his angelic face. "Merry Christmas, Carlisle."


End file.
